Several years ago, back when we were still new to the Connection Codes and to connected parenting, we took an epic road trip from our home in Nashville, Tennessee, all the way to Acadia National Park in Maine. On our way north we explored cities and towns in North Carolina, Virginia, Maryland, Pennsylvania, New York, and Massachusetts. Our kids were seasoned roadtrippers by this time but also young and this epic adventure was a lot of action in a short period of time, even for me, the adult.
I will never forget the night we spent in Boston, a week or so into our trip. The drive from New York to Boston was unbelievably slow. What should have taken about three hours took seven. Because of this delay we didn’t arrive at our airbnb until close to midnight. The airbnb apartment was on the third floor with no elevator and old hallways. The apartment itself was a beautiful space but the floors creaked and the windows loomed and it was new and unfamiliar. And it was late. So late.
We began settling the kids the moment we got there. But by then, our highly sensitive child was so far past their limit they became hysterical the moment we entered the apartment. Loud wailing ensued and I braced myself for there being no end in sight. (The Oooo was still new. At this point, I was still expecting it not to work every time.) I laid beside them on the bed they were to sleep in and put my hand on their back. I asked what was happening for them and Ooooed the heck out of them while they unloaded all of the pain they were experiencing from the day and in that moment. And in less than five minutes they were asleep. I was absolutely shocked and still to this day remember the feeling of relief that flooded my body that we weren’t going to be up until two trying to settle our wailing child.
My interactions with my highly sensitive child are what sold me on connected parenting so completely that I will never go back to cultural parenting. Before they were born, I experienced parenting their siblings on maybe a 6 out of 10 stress level on bad days and more like a 2 most days. After they were born I began experiencing the stress of parenting as an 11 on bad days and maybe a 6 on good days. Learning to be their parent was the steepest learning curve I had ever climbed and the most exhausting experience of my life. Until I began learning the Connection Codes tools.
I would describe pre-Connection Codes life with them as a battlefield of tears. And life with them now as shockingly peaceful. In that way the Connection Codes have saved my life, my relationship with my child, and probably my child’s life too.
Healing my connection with my highly sensitive child has helped heal my connection with my highly sensitive Self too. Learning to follow their energy, Oooo them, regard their experience, and validate their pain is teaching me how to do this for mySelf as well. I am the student. These experiences are my teachers. I am learning a whole new way of being. This way of being changes everything.
Are you the parent of a Highly Sensitive Child? Are you familiar with the battlefield of tears? Extend yourself and your child some extra Oooos this week. You deserve it. They do too.